1. Shoes must be removed and left in the porch. Those with athlete's feet must use special sandals supplied.

2. After using the toilet, flush twice and use the special spray provided. Also spray the toilet.

3. DO NOT URINATE in the swimming pool unless caught short. Please shake on the grass verge.

4. All females have to leave the premises by 11.45pm. Credit cards are not permitted.

5. The new large bed in the "Master Suite" can only accommodate up to twelve people.

6. All the bottles are marked and regularly checked for specific gravity to avoid dilution.

7. A truck turns up at 10.00am each day to collect the empties. It is advisable not to be laying in the grounds supine at the time as we are charged for a return load.

8. If Big "D" turns up he must not be admitted under any circumstances.

9. The proprietors have left a large box on the large table for donations to their favourite charity -"The Murphy Alcoholics Relief Fund". Coins are difficult to handle, cheques acceptable.

10. The local priest will visit on occasions. There is a special bottle provided labelled "cough mixture". When it is empty purchase a bottle of "Covrvosier 5 Star" and label accordingly